The Custodian
FADE IN
INT. ST. MARY’S CATHOLIC CHURCH, NEW ORLEANS — DAY
FATHER JACQUES LA FARGE, 50, the rector at St. Mary’s Catholic Church in New Orleans, is strolling slowly, thoughtfully, wearing a scowl in the empty sanctuary toward the altar.
CUT TO:
We see JOSEPH MORRIS, “MOJO,” 62, a church historian and custodian standing at a blackboard at the church teaching a class.
MOJO
So we have a discrepancy, here, don’t we — actually several.
STUDENT
They’re piling up.
MOJO
Yes they are. Well, as we’ve said, the Bible, especially the New Testament, is filled with errors, only, I prefer to call them edits … some of which are glaringly apparent.
CUT TO:
LA FARGE is standing outside a small living space, rather messy, with books everywhere. We see him inspecting a custodian’s closet. He pulls up a mop out of a bucket of water, with disgust, and lets it fall back in. We see LA FARGE stroll up to the class where MOJO is teaching and stop to look in.
CUT TO:
MOJO sees LA FARGE looking in. LA FARGE continues walking. Written on the blackboard are a list of questions: “How lovable is John, the son of Zebedee?” “Was John Jesus’ cousin? Is that a conflict of interest?” “Which John stands with a woman named Mary at Jesus’ cross?” “Who is buried in the Virgin Mary’s tomb?” A large print of Leonardo Da Vinci’s painting “The Last Supper” is taped to the blackboard.
MOJO
So, if this person is Mary … then we have only eleven male disciples. Which of the twelve is missing.
CLASS
(in unison, monotone) John.
MOJO
Which one?
CLASS
Son of Zebedee
MOJO
What if I told you that there may have been a thirteenth disciple, who is not present … either? And what if I told you his name was John.
The class is completely deadpan.
BLACK STUDENT
Is that the African … John? Boy, y’all gonna get it now.
CUT TO:
BRIAN MCADAMS, 45, who is attending the class, sees LA FARGE at the doorway. When LA FARGE passes, BRIAN looks at his watch, stands up and exits the classroom.
CUT TO:
LA FARGE, outside his office, speaks to assistant rector FATHER CHAD PRINGLE, 30.
LA FARGE
What are we doing letting a custodian teach a class. And in what, pray tell?
CHAD
As I’ve said Father La Farge … Mojo is not just a custodian.
LA FARGE
Says who?
CUT TO:
BRIAN is striding toward the church’s administrative offices.
CUT TO:
CHAD replies to LA FARGE
CHAD
He has several degrees. He’s a decorated veteran, Vietnam era, and, a church historian.
LA FARGE
Oh, for shit’s sake, Chad.
CHAD
He’s teaching a class on eschatology, as he has every year for the past ten years. … There’s someone here.
BRIAN steps into the reception area.
LA FARGE
What does a custodian know about the future?
BRIAN
Hi … um, Father … father.
CHAD
There’s only one of me. May I help you?
BRIAN
I have a one o’ clock appointment … with the head … father.
LA FARGE
Rector. Are you Mr. McAdams?
BRIAN
I am
LA FARGE
Well, come in. Thank you, Chad. … So, you still believe you’d like to convert to Catholicism?
BRIAN
It’s a fascinating, um, denomination. But, from my reading of the history books, well … there have been some problems.
CUT TO:
A STUDENT with his hand raised asks MOJO a question.
STUDENT
So, you’re saying that the people who actually hosted the lord’s supper in Jerusalem … were named John and Mary? And that they’ve been hidden … obscured? And most likely because they were … African? Who obscured them?
CUT TO:
LA FARGE
Well, no one’s perfect. (chuckling) But I can assure you, Mr. McAdams, the Inquisitions are well in the past.
CUT TO:
MOJO answers the student’s question.
MOJO
Unless the Coptic pope in Alexandria, Egypt is pulling our leg, yes, John Mark was an African, as was his mother Mary. And they hosted the last supper. John Mark would be the thirteenth disciple … the second man named John missing from Leonardo’s The Last Supper.
BRIAN
Now Constantine … what kind of a person was he?
LA FARGE
Oh, a super guy. Without him … we’re nowhere.
… to be continued
Janet Devlin
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